31 May 2014

Money and Love - Open to Abundance and Allow

How is everyone on this Friday night? I just had a philosophical debate with a friend about money. He said that money is not needed to achieve happiness and I went on a rampage. Whaaat??? So basically what he is saying that one can live in poverty, struggle in paying the bills and be happy??? Have you ever been in that situation when you are struggling financially? I have.  How is that not an obstacle to happiness? There is so much social research out there that lack of money creates stress and leads to physical illness as well. But who needs research when we know from our own experience how unpleasant and nothing less than unpleasant it is when there are problems with finances. Many years ago I had no money to decorate my flat, came home feeling depressed looking at the cracked walls and ceilings, feeling helpless because my salary was not big enough to afford decorating. Then life got better and I decorated my flat like a sanctuary, thanks to... money coming in. And now my flat is a place of rest, peace and relaxation. My home is now a a place which heals me every minute, a respite from any problems in the world outside, where I feel gladness and comfort no matter what challenges I have had from outside. There is a very big difference between how my home makes me feel now to how it used to make me feel when I had no money. Same goes for emotional turmoils - much easier to cry on a yacht, than to cry in poverty. Some of those who don't know how to make money devise whole philosophies about how unnecessary money is and try to manipulate the world to believe that, instead of getting their imagination in gear and starting creating and manifesting. Love, creativity, money is the same thing. Money is a good energy. Money and love is the same energy. When I started loving myself more - more money came into my life. Most people who don't have money are people who have issues with self - love. Please pay attention: Self-Love. Real self-love. Not the narcissistic self-adoration. But warm, kind, accepting, nurturing love towards oneself. Most people don't feel it. And that is why most people have problems with money. Money is not a dirty word but the means to achieve many beautiful things, including the sailing lifestyle which I want to live, which is a very natural, sincere non-materialistic aspiration. I don't want 5 star hotels, I don't want expensive clothes, shoes, bags, expensive hair-cuts and nails, expensive spa treatments. I want to sail all year round, jumping in the sea, swimming with the dolphins, being physically active every day, running naked on desert islands, living in harmony with nature, seeing the sun every day, feeling the rain on my skin, feeling the wind in my hair, eating only fresh and natural food and having enough time for relating and spiritual development. I don't have a gram of materialistic aspirations about my future, but paradoxically to achieve the non-materialistic lifestyle I want - it is the money that can make it happen. 

Hey this conversation tonight inspired me to start an abundance series of posts. I'm so much into abundance - love, money, health, joy. They are all the same energy. And I'm so happy that after a bad start in life, when I felt unloved due to incompetence of my parents (only when they were young, after that they've been great), I worked through issues of insecurity and self-criticism and self-judgement, and I reached a place when I became kinder to myself. Most people cringe at the thought of self-love. This is another dirty word. 'How dare you loving and liking yourself. That is immodest.' So after overcoming the hurdles placed by social norms and rules, I got to the self-love point. And money started coming much much more. To open the gates of abundance - self-love is the key: no longer judge yourself, no longer criticise yourself, accept yourself (that is a difficult one but can be done with some practise), accept the real you, not the one others think you are because you have had a mask on your face, not the one others want you and expect you to be, but the REAL YOU with all of your features good and bad. Getting tired easily - accept it. Not achieving very much - accept it. Not being motivated - accept it. Liking too much alcohol - accept it (In my work with addictions I can safely say that the cause for all addictions is the lack of acceptance of the addiction and the constant struggle with it.) Big bum - accept it. Small breasts - accept it. No hair - accept it. Too much hair - accept it. Too tall - accept it. Too short - accept it. STOP THE JUDGEMENT. SILENCE THE INNER CRITIC TOWARDS YOURSELF. BECOME KIND TOWARDS YOURSELF. AND THEN THE MIRACLES WILL HAPPEN. How will the miracles happen? We will open the gates of abundance. Why? Because judgement, criticism and lack of love towards ourselves - make us contracted, tightened, fastened. That state is unreachable by abundance. We need to expand, stretch, open. That is the state in direct contact with abundance. It is no longer a matter of abundance coming to you. It is YOU in the middle of all the abundance - abundance of Love, Joy, Money, Peace, Health. 

Wanting is another dirty word. "Oh, wanting is so bad, you must get only what you need, that is the only thing good for you, wanting will spoil you and will teach you the wrong things'. Who is the manager of my life? I am the manager of my life. I want therefore I am. I don't care what some quasi-spirituals tell me. I go and get things that I want. Why? Because I trust that there is an internal wisdom that governs my wants. These wants don't come from me being spoilt, I trust. I trust that I'm wise and every intuitive urge, calling, impulse I get comes from a deeper place of knowing, which I may or may not understand consciously. I trust in my eternal spirit and soul the ones that were never born and will never die. They know everything of all times, because they are timeless. Every time I have acted on a want and on an impulse I have achieved a good result. Never so far my wants and impulses have failed me. But what has failed me was the lack of trust in them when I was younger, what has failed me was inhibiting myself and controlling myself, and analysing and questioning myself, and demanding from myself to be perfect. Those things have failed me until I spotted them as the culprits for the lack in my life. The last time I acted on a want was last Friday, felt very drawn to a perfume shop, and I had to go in. I walked in and asked the shop assistant to give a heavy, heady, sweet, intoxicating perfume. She gave me Nero Absolute by Roberto Cavalli. I smelt it fell under its spell instantly. Exactly what I needed. To be embalmed in the sweetest fragrance that is also deep and mysterious, not playful and intriguing but much deeper than that - hypnotic, solid, holding you in its splendour and keeping you there. This is the most grounding, abundance inducing perfume I have come across since Versace's Crystal Noir. If you need a nice big dollop of help with the self - acceptance and self - love - use Nero Absolute. It soothes you gently into self-acceptance, it holds you tight into self-love, it is food, nothing less but food for the female soul. So another want another impulse paid off. My life is so much sensually and materially richer with Nero around. How did that happen? I felt splendid, I acted from a place of abundance not from a place of lack, I was open, expanded, accepting, allowing (not contracted, tight, assessing) and several opportunities presented themselves. I Said 'Yes'. Say 'Yes' to everything. This is another theory I came across recently but have not had a chance to explore it yet. The guy is an american milionnaire who says that if you keep saying 'yes' to all opportunities that present themselves to you, you will then stop the internal resistance that is intrinsic to most humans, and you will get into allowance and once you open the gates of allowance - the abundance floods in. Catch you later for some more abundance stuff, and let's get practical, and do some self-acceptance and self-love. Blessings and Love Shanti Shanti    

24 May 2014

A day in bed

The art of being
What a glorious day today spent in bed, restoring and rejuvenating. I'm in the new paradigm of abundance, listening to my body, leaving my body to make all the decisions for me and allowing. When my body says 'rest' I do rest. When my body says 'go' I do go. My body is now promoted to the Chief Executive of my Life because it understands the present moment better than my mind. The present moment is the timeless eternity where abundance resides. Stay present in your body and feel. From that connection Love and Joy are born, the vehicles that take us to abundance. And demote the mind, rushing scared, making plans, setting goals, because it knows only Time. I listen to my body saying 'no, take a step back, don't think about anything, don't worry about anything, just rest and allow. Every goal is resistance, every plan is resistance, stop doing, start being, let go and surrender to the divine plans made for you and allow them to unfold. Shanti shanti   

14 May 2014

Make Friends with Your Body

 Bilka Skincare Bilka Skincare

Make friends with your Body. A spirituality which does not honour the body is not a true spirituality <3 We give our body such a tough time, it is beyond belief.  Abuse, abuse, abuse.  If anyone else did the things we do to our body, we'd be taking them to court.  If we stay connected with our body we will never get ill.  All illness is symptomatic of our disconnection from our body, of our unlovingness towards our body.  The body contains all knowledge of everything.  There is no point going in the head and asking the mind: is this a good decision, what shall I do, what is the best thing to do.  All it takes is some tuning into the body and it will give all the answers. Add to this some loving care and attention and the body will reward us with endless energy, firmness, resilience, bounciness and youth.  Why do we think the body ages?  Because we rarely listen to it.  Mind is full speed ahead, light years ahead, disrespecting and abusing the body. Because Mind knows only Time, so Mind is scared of Time as Time is very scary.  But the Body knows Timelessness, the Body knows the Comfort, Joy and Ecstasy of the Present Moment, where there is no Time.  Time and Mind have no access there.  And I love the Mind, I respect the Mind for all the good things it has done, but it is time to demote it from its managerial role and It is time to promote the Body to the Chief Executive of our Life and praise it with songs of wisdom and devotion:  I love my body.  I listen to my body.  I honour my body.  My body makes every decision for me. I celebrate my body.  Om Shanti <3 <3 <3
 Bilka Skincare

 Bilka Skincare

 Bilka Skincare

10 May 2014

How to make the best of life when it gets tough

How to make the best of life even when things get tough? My accountant just served me the news that his fees have increased with 100% this year. When I was just planning to enjoy a work-free weekend and catch up on some yoga and training, I've got to sit down at the computer and do my accounts. My initial reaction was of extreme displeasure and pissed-offness. But I woke up today, cleaned my house, said hello to my flowers and noticed how serene and accepting my cat Gelly is of everything. My cat is my greatest teacher in life: accept reality for what is and don't resist your circustances. Goals and plans even when they are good goals and plans, don't always work out. Then what do we do? We let go, we surrender, we don't resist the circumstances facings us, we release the plans the expectations, we allow the natural unfolding of events with ease and peace. Om Shanti 
Bilka Skincare: peace and ease

 Someone has been working hard
Someone has been working hard 

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

 Bilka Skincare's Gelley

What does it mean when love does not work

Have you experienced a painful breakup of a relationship and wondered what the meaning of it was.  I've always asked myself this question and was never able to give an answer.  Why, why, why, did it have to happen this way, why couldn't we have been together and enjoyed a happy, sharing, mutually nurturing, supportive, loving relationship.  Why? And in addition to the pain from the ending, there was a big cloud of questions over my head and my body, mind and heart were frustrated for not being able to give an answer.  Reflecting, analysing, analysing, analysing, dissecting moment after moment of the past, just to gain a glimpse of understanding why the dynamics developed in such a way so that we ended up separating. And that was peeling the layers of an onion.  Another insight and another insight would pop up but only after lots of thinking and feeling the pain cutting deep.  So on 22 January when the inevitable end happened I did all of the above and despite my best efforts - I did not manage to reach an understanding why one minute things were spectacularly good and another minute disastrous and how I have contributed to that.  I could tell straight away how he contributed to that, but I had no insight of my own influence of the outcome, absolutely none.  And I knew that was not the real truth - to blame one person, but I didn't understand what I was doing wrong.  Until today.  

Four emotionally dreadful months later,  I am emerging on an European Cycling Adventure, which inspires me and fuels me with desire.  A desire not to bond, and share and do all the nice things loved up people do, but a desire to be free, to do unplanned and unpredictable things, to not know what my next day will be, to learn new skills like sailing and touring on a bike,  to meet like-minded people, to have lots and lots of fun, to do impulsive things without a care in the world, to share myself with the world, not just with one person, to go with the flow, to say 'yes' to every new opportunity, to slow down and spot the opportunities (as before I was so focussed on him, he was the centre of my universe and everything else was ignored), to do as I please, without giving explanations, to enjoy participating in the unfolding of completely unknown life to me - of being more natural, less deliberate and controlling, more accepting, less micromanaging every minute of my daily routine and more being open to surprises, unexpected events, offers, possibilities.  Hey, this is the new me.  And this feels very very much like me.  But I was not like that in January and before.  I was a completely different person. And I look back and finally finally finally I understand.  The meaning of my relationship break up was to get me to this point.  Phew.  Four months of analysing, boring friends to death, and none of those discussions led to much.  Who I am today unfolded by itself, as a consequence to the emotional trauma, as a consequence to the tears, the heart beats, the shortness of breath and the pain in the heart.  Not as a result of the analysing and not as a result of setting new goals or drawing new plans of action.  It grew organically from within from the spirit and the heart.  It was a deep cutting pain and the spirit had to take charge and lead the way out of that mess and the way that is right for me.  

Today I realise that the destructive relationship had paved the way to the European cycling adventure. Today I realise that the meaning of the breakup was to get me to where I am now - looking forward to a new paradigm of living, creating a new paradigm of living.  Today I realise that 22 January which is still the worst day of my life,  has kick-started a momentum of the new paradigm and this momentum is now rolling at full speed. Today I realise that beneath the cultural layers of conditioning - a woman needs to be in a relationship to validate her existence, there is a big spirit inside which has been laying dormant for years but it got woken up by the brutality of the separation.  It was the Tower of the tarot.  It was traumatic, it was disastrous.  But it had made me awake.  Today I realise that I didn't know myself well enough.  I knew I wanted love and loving relationship and I still do.  But I didn't know of that deeper layer inside, a layer wanting to be free, not constrained within the boundaries of a relationship but more spaciousness around me, more friends, more like-minded people, as Tom Kaypacha calls it - seeking my tribe in his weekly Pele report 

I used to specialise in 1:1 intimacy but today I am a completely different person.  I want to be with the tribe, and for the first time in my life I have so many friends and contacts of good people.  

Today I realise that today has been my goal without me even knowing.

When we come to that point when love is not working, we can still go in the direction of the mind, it won't do harm to ignite the neurons and reach a few valuable insights.  But that would not be enough to make us understand why the breakup happened, what meaning and purpose our suffering holds.  

I woke up today wanting to go where the wind takes me, not to pre-book anything in advance, just to cycle till I drop and then sleep where I end up.  Today was the purpose and the meaning of the breakup.  

Shanti shanti

Louise Gylsen


5 May 2014

How to know the true path for you

How awesome that a nice momentum is building in my life, shouting very loudly that it is the correct path to take. I pick up the phone, I get a voice on the other side willing and able to help me for a change. Then that phone call leads to another phone call and to another phonecall, which led to the emergence of a sparkly sexy itinerary for my holiday, which fuels me with desire. Called the ferry company to get a ticket, it was the last ticket for about 10 days, if it had gone, I would have had to delay leaving for 10 days!!! If that is not a clear and loud message 'Go', I don't know what is. Then a couple of messages on fb and found inspiring friends to join. The universe is conspiring to help me get out of my prison and liberate me in a nice, soft, gentle way, so that I can heal from the emotional disaster of this year so far, which made me very ill. And I observe how everything is unfolding in front of my eyes and I can't believe it. Because my issue was finances, how to get money together to allow me not to work for some time, etc, etc. But suddenly this is no longer an issue. And I am watching in amazement how divine intervention is laying down a red carpet in front of me and inviting me to take this very unknown path to me - a long holiday, no fixed arrangements for accommodation, fluid, flexible, spontaneous, open to new opportunities. Yay!!! That is exactly my thing which I have suppressed for many years. And also being torn by conflicting priorities. I love working on my business, living in my beautiful home, training in my park and cuddling with my cat. I still love those things, and my departure will be bitter-sweet. They are the comfort, safety- loving part of me, and I honoured them for many years. But this year everything at home got infused with my sadness following the break up with my beloved man. It got so heavy that I had to stop, take lots of luggage out and decorate, repaint walls, ceilings, clear clear clear. It took me half a day just to throw rubbish out. And now my home is back to liveable, one more room left to repaint but all the rest is done and sparkling with freshness and hope. Yes hope and faith, which deserted me in January so much so I became to nurture a death wish. It was deep and serious low, of the kind I had not known before. So the path is now cleared, and my home is livable again but it is asking me to clear the last bits of sadness left in me, now that it's fresh and new, it wants me to be fresh and new too and leave it for a while and have some fun, enjoy the sun and the company of good inspiring people who have been doing for years what I've always wanted to do. In the past I have wondered - what is my destiny, what is my role here, am I doing the right thing, how do I know what I'm here to do, how do I know what the correct course of action is? And this is how. This is a universal technique that applies to everyone's life. Are you in the midst of a momentum or are you struggling with obstacles on every step. Obstacles = not the right path. Momentum = correct course of action. Om shanti